I sit on my porch watching the sun go down wondering “who knows?”
Who knows, that I wonder when I close my eyes at night if I will wake up the next morning?
Who knows, that I wonder what the next day is going to bring, something good or something bad?
Who knows, that I wonder sometimes why I am here on this earth?
Hi, my name is Pamela. When I was a little girl I did not have these thoughts. I just wondered what toy I would play with next. As I got older I was a tomboy and played baseball, kickball and climbed trees with the boys. I just wondered when my friends could come out and play.
When I got into my adult years, I wondered, can I return to my childhood? Here I am, in my entire adult looking garb, a woman crying inside like a child, wanting my mother—sometimes life can be hard.
I stand before you today asking you, what do you wonder about? What wakes you up at night sometimes?
As I walk this journey as an adult, I realize I am not alone. There are so many in this world who feel the same way. I realize my purpose is not about “me,” as my flesh and my heart will fail me, but about my love for others, as this will endure me.
Each day I wake up I know it is a brand new day that I will rejoice and be glad!
I learned from this quote “never ask “why me” when bad things happen unless you also ask “why me” when good things happen.” And don’t be surprised if your happiest moments are when you are doing things for others. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “The purpose of life is not to be happy, it is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, and to have it make some difference that you lived and lived well.”
So through my journey of wonderment and life, I would like to cite a scripture that I feel truly sums up why I am on this earth, why I can close my eyes at night, and why I can wake up expecting something good in life.
Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Psalm 73:25-26